By Rama B.

The question I used to ask myself was, “When will he be weaning?”

During the summer, after five and a half years of breastfeeding on demand, he decided to sleep in his own bed and asked me just to hold his hand before sleeping. He did not ask to nurse.

Two weeks later, he decided to move to a different room to sleep in his own bed. I was surprised and also very happy to see his confidence in doing so. At the same time, I could not believe that I was struggling to fall asleep alone, without him. That’s funny, isn’t it?

So I think that now the real question is, “Am I ready to wean?” He still breastfeeds in the morning when he wakes up and occasionally before sleeping. He is slowly outgrowing that need. It is really impressive, and I cherish each feed before it stops completely.

What I am wondering now, more than how he will wean, is how I will manage mothering after the end of the breastfeeding journey? I guess that I will figure it out when it comes.

I am trying to understand the mixed feelings coming at a moment I did not expect. This is the new chapter in our lives.

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